WOULD YOU DARE? OPEN COMMUNICATION WITH THE FAMILY= NO SECRETS, NO LIES

Geraldine P. Balbada
BCR 3-1D

photo from google.com

Being close and honest to your family are important factors in building a good relationship inside your clan. But not telling ALL your secrets doesn’t mean that your LYING, it’s just everyone deserves PRIVACY, and everyone HAS a secrets to keep better not to be told and besides some secrets makes your family a  little more exciting and more interesting. :)
For me, secrets are the things that should be kept until you have the guts to tell it to someone. No matter how close you are to your mom and dad or your siblings or cousins there are still things you don’t want them to know from you, but im not telling you not to update yourself to your family. It’s just your avoiding things/matters that you think better not to tell them.
There are reasons for keeping secrets to your family such as; to avoid disagreement and confrontation, to protect someone from pain, embarrassment for what had happen, afraid of what will be the effects of your hidden action or just because you made a promise not to tell it. Sometimes we have to know what the boundaries of our secrets are, and know when to tell it and face it.
Building a Good relationship to your family is not EVOLVING in telling ALL the things in your life that had happen. It’s on the way how you handle and make things possible for the sake of yourself and for the sake of your love ones. It’s on the way how you treat your family and how you make them feel that you love them.
Sometimes you’ll having second thoughts in telling a secret because you think “it will make things worse” and you don’t want that to happen so you let them think that everything is fine and you’re the one who’s adjusting those things to make it looks like the same.
Another thing is the knowledge that "What they don't know won't hurt them." I always think this way. Always think that if they don’t know what had happen, they won’t be affected but that’s wrong. I’ve been suffered because of that. When I was in high school I use to have a black diary containing all my secrets from my 1st high school crush to losing a big chunk of money, actually that money is for my field trip and someone stole it, then one of my friends lend me a money so I can still go on our fieldtrip. After a month my lil brother found my diary and he READ it. Gosh. And all the hell broke lose. Mom is so mad about it, telling me things, and finally she said that I should have talk to her for that matter, they would be angry for sure but they can forgive me for that and even give me money again. See? There’s no lil dirty secret that wont revealed so as early as possible tell them and explain of what had happen. Besides they are your family, no matter what happen they are the ones who’ll be there for you and accept you behind your FLAWS and Secrets.
By the way I read something on net about secrets from youragingparent.com saying…
“…Sooner or later, that secret, the whole truth, is going to be revealed. When that happens, a loving relationship based on trust is damaged. People are hurt more than they would have been if everyone had simply been honest from the beginning…Telling the truth is another way you show your love for your parent. Love between adults makes many demands, and one of them is honesty. Love never tricks a person. Love never uses a person's resources without that person's knowledge. Love never says "I know what's best for you and so you have no say in this." The truth can be cold and cruel and terrifying. When we tell that truth or when we hear it, we need the warmth, the caring, and the comfort only a loved one can give.”